Red In The Face

"Do you know why this happens?" I point an accusatory finger at my near-purple face as I walk past the check-in desk after yoga.

The instructor shrugs. "It's just part of your constitution," she says warmly.

I make a face.

"It's part of your dosha - part of who you are," she continues, growing more serious at the realization that I perhaps do not appreciate my God-given dosha. "It probably means you're a fiery, passionate person with a type A personality who craves stability and control."

Now I'm uncomfortable. She's pegged me in 30 seconds.

"Does it have anything to do with why I sometimes get lightheaded in class?" I ask, to change the subject.

She nods, "It could."

"Is there anything I can do to lessen that?" 

She smiles, sensing my fiery dosha at work, attempting to correct this problem, all problems, until I am red in the face. "You can stand up more slowly," she says. "Or squeeze your butt."

" butt?"

"Yes, squeeze your butt when you stand. It'll get blood flowing away from your brain."

I shrug, "Okay. I'll try that, thanks."

She gives me a gracious parting nod.

As I walk out to my car, I make a mental note: When red in the face, squeeze butt.

Could it really be that simple? Could it be that the solution to my control issues, the key to a less-fiery self was here in my butt all along? 

I sit in the driver's seat and try it a few times. My face bounces up and down in the rear view mirror. It makes me laugh, and then I contemplate the hilarity of flexed butts in general, and in my happiness I feel my red face begin to wane.

When red in the face, squeeze butt!

Alternatively, find a reason to laugh.